two wongs, or, hyperstunting the obvious
Music: Editors: The Back Room (2005) I have safely arrived at my holiday destination somewhere in Hotlanta from what proved to be quite a pleasant plane ride: after discovering I was seated next to a demanding two year old and his "spare the rod"-style mother, a gentleman standing in the aisle kept banging my head with his fancy, overstuffed leather purse. It turns out that he was trying give up his first class seat so that he might sit with his beloved in the stale yet freshly vacuumed "coach." I overlooked his abuse of my forehead and possible brain injury and reluctantly volunteered, moved to the very first seat just beyond the foreboding "go no further, RUBE"-style curtains, where upon was treated to always piping, fresh coffee, fresh fruit, moist towelettes and the foot room of five Hobbits!
Even better, just before boarding I caught an extended interview clip of Donald Trump. Apparently just the day prior Rosie O'Donnell---perhaps in an effort to cover-up or over her racist flap---ranted about The Donald's newfound moral authority. Whence such self-proclaimed authority? Because, I learned, Miss USA was busted for underage drinking and "partying" with Miss Teen USA. I also learned that Miss Nevada had drunken pictures circulating the Internet featuring hot, hetro-faux-lesbo tongue-kissing action (which just goes to show you these pageants are uber-repressive apparatuses, right!?!? Here's the whole gallery in case you need to see "acting-out" documented).
What has this to do with the Donald? Well, he owns the Miss USA franchise and his Miss USA people wanted to de-crown Miss USA for partying, snorting blow, and humping outside of wedlock. Instead, The Donald held a press conference to announce that Tara Conner deserved a second chance, that she was going to drug and alcohol abuse counseling, and that we can all learn from her mistake(s). This apparently incensed O'Donnell, who fired off on The View that the woman was just partying, it's not a big deal (I agree with Rosie). She then flipped her hair to resemble The Donald's bad toupee, and questioned: who was he to hold a conference premised on his moral authority? (We can embellish to help Rosie out a bit: moral authority is a metonymic slide from economic autonomy, Rupert Murdoch's Fox-logic and an important clue to this intriguing media ruckus!) Rosie said that the Donald was an adulterer and a scammer, and that he filed for bankruptcy three times. Today, as my jaw dropped, they aired this clip in the George Bush Houston International airport.
Like most things excessive, initially I thought the Donald's remarks were legit and I was entertained. I also thought calling Rosie "ugly" and "fat" was a little over the top, and reasoned that the working class (signaled by "truck driver") would probably be pissed at The Donald. Then I got to thinking as I was on the plane that the remarks were in fact misogynistic. Then I got to wondering why he didn't say something homophobic (since he went ahead and insulted women, obesity, and the working class). Both of them, however, went after each other in terms of economic success: Rosie accused The Donald of being anything but a self-made "Man"; the Donald expressed joy at Rosie's magazine and television show failures. The bottom line of the melee is, in fact, the bottom line as a source of moral authority.
What is curious to me is that Rosie left her critique implicit. If you go back to the clip, one of the co-hosts (to Rosie's left) remarks "I think it's brilliant," trying to get Rosie to say what is implied: The Donald's press conference was a publicity stunt. O'Donnell is trying to call him out on the tactic, but why does she go for the joke at the risk of blunting the critique? Of course, The Donald answers in his counter-blast: The View hired O'Donnell to boost sagging ratings, and she has been deliberately "running at the mouth" (and it's working). Is it no surprise that the viewership of Miss Teen USA, Miss USA, and Miss Universe was down last year, that Trump needed to do something to garner some mo' eyeballs? The Donald taking on an smart, emasculating woman is precisely what he needed. The man is Greed Incarnate, Greed on a Stick; you can see every moral and aesthetic judgement he makes about Rosie as dollar signs flicker in his beady lil' orbs.
This is Baudrillard's hyperreal on a stick, folks. Although I'm not so sure O'Donnell really knew how well this was going to work out (for her), The Donald seized the moment premised on that superficial homology between finance capital and representation, and I mean "superficial" only in the sense that it's turtles all the way down.