the break-up

Music: Hope Sandoval and the Warm Inventions: Through the Devil Softly (2009) " . . . and so, I think it went well. They seemed happy."

"It sounds like you did an amazing job."

[checks pocket watch] "So, I guess I need to bring up an uncomfortable topic before we end the session."

"Um, ok."

"I've decided I am going to take a break from therapy. I'm in a good place---"

"This is about the hearing." [back stiffens, she sits erect]

"Well, yes, of course it is. It's been a lot to take in. Nothing compared to what you're dealing with, I know, I know, but I---"

"I wish I didn't invite you. If I knew this would be the result, I wouldn't have---"

"I know, I understand. I mean, neither of us expected what happened. But because of it, you know, the nature of our relationship has changed. I mean, I feel more like a colleague or friend, and it's just---"

"What did you think coming the hearing was going to accomplish for you?"

"________, you know, I wanted to be supportive."

"You asked if you could come. I think---"

"You kept bringing it up in our meetings, so I thought you wanted support, and I wanted to be supportive, and of course I was curious, given what I study, and I---"

"Well, I don't think you're being very supportive now."

[angrily] "This is not about your feelings, _______. The roles here are getting mixed up. I don't pay you $100 an hour to work-through your feelings."

"True. But we have to work through this, together. That's what therapy is about."

"But I don't want to work through it. I mean, this is not garden-variety resistance---I've been with you for five years. I'm just emotionally exhausted, and I want to put this to the side and focus on my work and---"

"I think you're being very underhanded about this."

[stifling an f-bomb] "I'm sorry you feel that way."

"To move to a higher level of healing, health, and maturity, the right thing to do is work with me through this."

"I'm sorry ________. Let me be very clear. Over these many years my time with you has been tremendously helpful. I've learned I'm a "feminine" soul, and a sensitive person, and empathetic. And I've learned some of the triggers for my insecurities. I've just learned a lot. You have helped me to learn alot about myself, and I'm very grateful for this time, this time we have had together. And I wouldn't change that for anything."

"Good. I am happy to hear that. And my door is open to you, when you're ready to come back and work through this. [stands] Well, enjoy the rest of your summer" [accepts check].

"Goodbye."

[curtly] "Bye bye."